I am definitely not the smartest kid on the block - money-wise. And now there's solid proof.

I am (actually) very laughable. Why else would fellow homo sapiens make fun of me? Big Blur Dodo Bird; Bimbo; Silly Woman. [you may add on to the list]

I cannot pronounce 'veterinary' (and all other related words) even after 50 tries. And to think that is my life-long ambition.

I am (actually) not funny; it takes me two days to write one witty statement.

I am not profound. I know nuts about philosophy (and life).

I can't sing. For mankind's sake, I've been told I shouldn't.

I know too many people, but too few deeply.

I am cheapskate party-goer.

I do think it's easier to become a problem kid with debauched morals and blame it on my family.

I am a... more of a bastard than bitch on a bad day. I could make my own life a living hell. Go figure.

I can never win a verbal fight; my brain works on a 3-second lag. Maybe longer.

I like to be creative. But I have no farking idea when asked to do so.

I have been portrayed as a braggadocio. -shrugs shoulders nonchalantly- Well, maybe.

Despite all these, I haven't had time to throw myself off a building. You see, I have very little conviction. Perhaps my only saving grace is that I can easily strut on a 4-inch stiletto on any given ground without tripping over myself or looking like an awkward giraffe.

But what is between the facade and the unrevealed is a gaping void. Besides dark chocolate, caffeine and alcohol, I have nothing else to offer to fill this void.